


The Unheard Love

by kiyocchi



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Bottom Kise, Kaijou High (Freeform), M/M, kisesexual
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-09-02
Updated: 2017-09-24
Packaged: 2018-04-18 16:28:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 8
Words: 13,853
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4712684
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kiyocchi/pseuds/kiyocchi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kise is diagnosed with cancer but to discover he is at the last stage. He confessed his feelings to Aomine but it was taken as a joke. As he was still grieving about bringing this love for Aomine with him to the grave, Midorima unexpectedly confessed to Kise, and lets see what happens next.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Unheard Love

**Author's Note:**

> My English might not be perfect, since it is not my first language. But i am trying my best. It is the first time that i am posting on AO3 and i look forward to posting more of my crazy plots here. Do read and review, it really encourages me a lot. If you see any room for improvement, please do tell me so i can produce better quality fanfics next time, and each of my chapters arent very long i hope you'll dont mind. (i have serious procrastination problems) Thank you, and i hope you like my work! Here goes the first chapter!

THE UNHEARD LOVE :chapter 1  
Kise’s POV  
I, Kise Ryouta. Led a happy life. Happy with my job as a model, as the ace of my basketball team. And of course, being in love with the ace of Too Aomine Daiki. It had been one sided love all along. Our relationship stayed as friends or sometimes rivals on court and off court. I would always bug him to play one-on-one with me, though he finds me annoying for being noisy and all cheerful, I still loved to spend time with him. I didn’t dare to confess as for his personality he would hate or even end our friendship if he found out that I had this type of feelings for him, and of course I don’t want that. I want to stay the way we are right now, I am happy to be by his side, watch him play basketball, all his stunning moves and amazing power that I adore and admire. But it changed, I wanted him to know about my feelings towards him, I wanted to confess my love out loud to him, to let him know that I love him more than anything in this entire universe…….

I was diagnosed with cancer when I decided that. 

I was unprepared to receive a news like that, although both my grandparents have passed away due to cancer, I thought I would be lucky enough to live my life healthily. But no, I was wrong. My life was just starting to look better, I’m working hard to improve on my basketball in order to win Aominecchi, I have a bigger dream of becoming a pilot and most importantly to have him in my life.  
“We are sorry to tell you that you only have 5 months left……”

But it seems like I can no longer fulfill whatever that I wanted. I have limited time, limited energy. I need him to know, before I run out and leaves this world.  
I came to accept this slowly, my faith, the truth that I’m on the verge of death. I’m getting weaker, my body could no longer support from the heavy basketball training and the busy schedule as a model, but I am still trying hard to keep up, not giving up either of it, living the way I used to be, still bugging him to play one-on-one with me. I told no one about my condition, I don’t want them to be worried. My dear and most beloved friends and teammates. I have been collapsing at work, my manager was really worried, she asked me if I am ill, of course I had to say no, I made up excuses saying that I am just too exhausted from practice or I forgot to eat lunch. Luckily she didn’t suspect anything. I couldn’t focus during training and my stamina became weaker, my skin lost its healthy glow, I was slim but I am starting to look anorexic. It was impossible for my teammates to not realize the change in me, especially my captain, Kasamatsu Senpai. He was mad at me for not being able to focus during training and questioned me about my weight, I couldn’t find any excuses to make them less worried, “I am fine ssu~ Don’t worry guys~” this had become my most frequent line…….

20 days left…….  
At this point of time, I am too weak to take care of myself, I was forced to be hospitalized and of course, I lied again. To assure my teammates, I told them I would be on a business trip to Paris for a fashion tour for a few weeks, meeting all the famous designers and learning more about fashion. Captain was unhappy but he still accepted it, it was always so heart-warming to his see his messed up and angry face as he shouts at me for skipping so many practices, I could tell the worried tone in his voice, I knew how much they cared for me, and that’s the reason why I didn’t want them to be worried. I assured them I would be back to practice immediately after come back from Paris. About my job, I lied to my manager about the team going to America for an exchange program to improve our basketball skills. My manager said it was fine and that she would take care of everything before I get back.  
Little did they know, that was my last good-bye……  
Lying in the ward filled with white, it kind of gave me peace. I came to acceptance and waited for the days to pass. I cried lots, crying for my regrets and unfulfilled wishes. The loneliness was killing me as the physical pain grew. I want to see Aominecchi again, and tell him how I feel. I finally pick up my courage and decided to confess, I picked up my phone and texted him.

“Aominecchi~ could you come to the court now?~ the usual one~”

“huh… tsk.. 1 on 1 again?.. Im lazy to....”

“Pls?.. It wouldn’t take long…~”

“tsk… fine”

I changed out of my hospital gown and into my own clothes, I used some foundation to cover up my unhealthy looking pale skin, before sneaking out of the hospital. I went to the usual court that we always play one-on-one at and waited for him to arrive. I saw his tall figure approaching as I calmed myself telling myself that I can do this. He stood in front of me.

“Where’s the ball?.....Don’t you want to play one-on-one?”

 

“Actually no ssu… I want to tell you something…..” I lowered my head in embarrassment

 

“huh?! You asked me to come out all the way here just to tell me something?!” He sounded really pissed, but I’m used to it.

 

“I-I like you…. Aominecchi…..”

 

There was a few seconds of awkward silence before he spoke.

 

“Oi, Kise what are you talking about?.... Don’t be stupid….” He looked away

 

“I-I am serious ssu! I am in love with you! Aominecchi!”

“Don’t be gross Kise, are you here to pull a joke on me?! Tsk…..”

I knew it, he thinks its gross… I didn’t hope for anything in the first place.

“I am serious ssu…. Believe it or not… That’s all I want to say…..saiyonara…” I hurried away, turning my back on him, tears overflowed uncontrollably.

“Oi! Kise!”

I didn’t dare to look back, I rushed and returned to the hospital. Returning to my dull ward, the familiar smell of alcohol. Emotionally racked and physically strained, I cried. A lot, more than I have ever had in my entire life. Although I had expected that answer from him but I didn’t expect it to hurt this much.  
I had no last resort, but one, and that is what is waiting for me. Death.  
Confessing to Aomine was the last thing I want to do before I die, despite the many unfulfilled dreams that I had. And now, I have completed that last thing I want to do, I don’t see the reason to continue this physical and emotional pain on myself. Perhaps, just maybe, if Aominecchi had accepted my feelings I would gain my hope to live and to recover from this impossible illness, or at least be happy for the last moments of my life. But now, I have lost everything, my love, my admiration, my desire to stay in this world that held no meaning to me anymore.  
I called for the doctor, moments later he came in with a thin piece of paper in his hand, it reads, ‘Organ Donation’. The doctor handed me the piece of paper and under the column for ‘Organ of donation’ I wrote down, ‘heart’. I thought, maybe my heart will bring someone else love and happiness. I signed the paper and passed it back to the doctor, he sighed and asked, “are you sure about this?....” I nodded biting my lips, I didn’t want myself to regret this…….


	2. When he Finds out

It is about time, time to tell my friends about my condition, after all I really love them, well of course as friends. I took out phone and dialed Midorimacchi’s number. Although Midorimacchi is a tsundere and is always mean to me on the outside, but in actual fact, he is a really gentle and caring person, he is always there for me when I needed it and I will always go to him whenever I need to rant or when I am feeling down. We are the closest amongst the 6 of us, at least this is what I think. He picked up the call almost immediately with his usual tone that shows the slightest emotions.  
“What is it Kise? I thought you are in Paris.” He had his usual flat tone

“Ah.. Midorimacchi, s-sorry, I lied ssu….” I spoke in an apologetic tone

“Where are you now nanodayo?” he sounded rather calm

“I-in the hospital….” I softened my voice 

“Why are you in the hospital?” He didn’t sound worried, that was kind of disappointing, but I’m used to it, that’s the way he is.

“Can you come? I’m at XXX hospital XXX ward.” I was holding in my tears, I just remembered the times we spent together in school, times where we played basketball together, I’ve kind of start to regret my decision earlier.

“You haven’t answer my question nanodayo” he raised his voice slightly

“I…. I will explain later ssu….”

 

“Thank you so much Midorimacchi, you are the best!~” I tried to sound as cheerful as I could although I am feeling extremely bitter inside.

“I-it’s not like I care about you or anything, it’s just that Oha-asa said helping Gemini will bring me luck nanodayo…” 

I could totally imagine Midorimacchi’s embarrassed face at the other side of the phone.

“Yea….. Thank you ssu…~ I’ll be waiting….” I brightened my voice slightly.

After we hung up, I waited nervously in the ward for his arrival. My hands were grasping onto the sheets tightly as I took deep breathes to calm myself. I reached for a piece of tissue paper on the counter to wipe off my cold sweat on my forehead and adjusted my hair and clothes, preparing for his arrival, trying to look as health as I possibly could.

I heard the door opening as I put up a smile on my pale and weak looking face. Midorimacchi entered the ward with his usual poker face. His lucky item for today was a stuffed toy dog, it looked kind of cute with him. He frowned slightly the moment when he saw my face and walked closer to my bed before sitting down the chair beside it.

“Kise, I want a proper explanation nanodayo.” A slightly tense look appeared on his face.

I smiled weakly before replying, “ Mouu~ Midorimacchi~ why are you so serious ssu?~ how have you been recently? Good?” I tried to avoid that topic that I know would make the atmosphere really tense, but I know Midorimacchi wouldn’t be misled by me.

“I demand a clear explanation nanodayo…” 

I looked down as I nervously played with my hands, “I –I… don’t know how to say ssu…”

“Use your mouth.” 

 

“……………. Mouu… Midorimacchi you aren’t funny ssu…..”

“I want the reason.” 

“C-cancer….” I mumbled in a voice that I myself could hardly hear

“Huh?.....” obviously he didn’t hear what I said

 

“I was diagnosed…. W-with cancer…” I softened my voice to the extreme when I said the last word.

 

“You were diagnosed?”

“With cancer……” I made sure this time he was able to hear what I said.

I felt like the world went silent when I finally said it. Midorimacchi’s expression was one that I’ve never seen before, I saw shock, disbelief, or maybe it’s just my hallucination, but also pain. I kept quiet and waited for Midorimacchi to speak, I didn’t want to look at his face with mixed emotions. 

Midorimacchi took a few deep breathes and calmed himself before he asked, “Kise, you are not joking?..” 

I simply shook my head, grasping tightly onto the bed sheets. I didn’t want to speak so to not expose my shaky voice. Tears started overflowing from my eyes, the tear drops dissolved as it touches the sheets, just like my life that is so fragile now.

“Why did you tell us earlier?!” Midorimacchi stood up from his chair all of sudden, shouting into my face. It was the first time I’ve seen Midorimacchi being so emotional….

I didn’t know how to respond, I looked up at him with tears in my eyes and it is blurring my vision. The tears continued to fall even more furiously, but I just couldn’t make a sound, I have so much I want to say, I want to apologize, I want to tell him how much I treasured them, but those words are just stuck at my throat, suffocating me. 

Midorimacchi suddenly came to the realization that he shouted at me and looked away, “I didn’t mean to shout… Sorry…” 

I shook my head, trying to tell him that its okay, but I just couldn’t speak. 

 

“Kise, when were you diagnosed?...” he calmed himself and asked.

“……….. 5 months ago…” I somehow controlled my sob and replied to Midorimacchi’s question.

His face was in shock again, and anger. “Why didn’t you tell us?” I saw him grabbing onto his lucky item tightly. 

“……………………….” I couldn’t answer, I know he will get mad again…

“Kise… you said you would give me an explanation.” He adjusted his glasses with a tense frown.

“I-I didn’t want everybody to be worried….. I ... I…..” 

“And what makes you think that by telling people now will make them feel any better?! “ He raised his voice with a harsh tone.

“I-I’m sorry…. I….I…..” I looked down once again, feeling guilty.

Midorimacchi sighed and sat back down on his chair, the next thing he did was something that I would never expect in my whole life. He leaned towards me, cupping my cheeks, I could tell his eyes were filled with pain and sadness. Before I could react, our lips met. My eyes were wide open, filled with shock. I didn’t know why he did that.

“M-Midorimacchi?.. W-what…? W-why did you?...”

“Kise you are really a idoit…” he looked away blushing slightly.

“Eh-Eh?.....”

“I’ll tell the rest about your condition.” He said firmly.

“Midorimacchi, could you do me a favor?.. Don’t tell Aominecchi….”

“I understand. I’ll go check with the doctor about your conditions.”

I nodded at him, forcing a smile. I have already told the doctor to not tell anyone about the organ donation, or else, Midorimacchi will get even angrier neh…. I know I am dying, I can tell I am getting weaker and I have accepted that, all I could ask for now is to have my friends to be with me for the last few days of my life. By the time when Midorimacchi came back to the ward, I’m already asleep as I was tired from all the crying and tense nerves.  
Third person’s POV  
Midorima stood by the bed, looking at the sleeping Kise, he frowned with sadness in his eyes before brushing off the hair on Kise’s forehead and placed a gentle peck on his forehead.

“I guess my feelings will never be delivered…” he sighed and pulled up the blanket for Kise before leaving the ward. 

Midorima felt like it was the worst day in his entire life. He didn’t even have the mind to think that whether if he got the wrong lucky item. None of that matter anymore, he hate to admit it, but he didn’t know when those feelings developed for Kise. He thought he was just a bubbly and annoying blond model, but somehow, his bubbly atmosphere, his outstanding and shiny personality was what he fell for. Now that he have received the news, those feelings are getting back at him so strongly, he once again realized how much he loved Kise. He regrets treating Kise as if he is not necessary, regrets taking him for granted.

Midorima laid in bed staring at the ceiling and hesitantly took out his phone before dialing Akashi’s number.

“What is it Shintaro?” Akashi picked up the call almost immediately.

“Could you help me assemble everyone, we will meet at my house. I have something to say..”

“What is it that you can’t tell us through the phone?”

“It’s about Kise nanodayo… And don’t tell Aomine…” He frowned.

“Alright, I got it. “ He ended the call. Akashi could tell that it is something serious.

An hour later, the Kiseki gathered at Midorima’s house. 

Kuroko arrived first, “Sorry for the intrusion, Midorima-kun” 

Then it was Momoi, “ Hello Mido-rin~~ “ she was smiling brightly, but upon seeing Midorima’s tense expression, she kept quiet. “Mido-rin? What happened? Why is your face so tense?”

“I’ll explain later….” He frowned even more.

Akashi arrived together with Murasakibara, “Shintaro we are here.” “Mido-chin~ do you have sweets? I finished mine….”

Midorima chose to ignore Murasakibara, he was already in a very bad mood. Everyone except for Kise and Aomine was at Midorima’s house and in his room waiting for the dreadful news to be announced.

“So what do you want to tell us Shintaro?” Akashi spoke first.

“It’s about Kise nanodayo.” He adjusted his glasses.

“Ah.. now that you have said it, where is Ki-Chan?~” asked Momoi.

“Eh… really.. Kise-chin isn’t here….”

“Did something happen to Kise-kun? “

Midorima frowned before answering their question. “Kise was diagnosed…..”

“With cancer.. And he is in the later stage… I checked with the doctor, it was hereditary, both his grandparents passed away from brain cancer…..And it was diagnosed 5 months ago, now he only have a month left.”

The overloading and shocking information was too much for them to handle, there was a few minutes of silence before Momoi first started sobbing. Murasakibara stopped eating and stared blankly at his bag full of chips. Akashi was the most calm, he asked Midorima, “How reliable is your information?”

“I went to see him earlier…”

“How is Kise-kun?” Kuroko asked as he was comforting Momoi. His face was tense too, much unlike his usual poker face. 

“He don’t look good at all, though he is still putting up that annoying smile of his.” He frowned while adjusting his glasses.

“We will go visit him tomorrow after practice.” Announced Akashi frowning too.


	3. The Big News

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Kiseki finds out about Kise's illness.

The next day……….

Akashi assembled everyone for a late lunch before going to visit, but Aomine decided to tag along with Momoi when he heard that Akashi will be buying the meal, Akashi also made himself clear that Aomine will have to leave immediately after he finished his meal. Everyone didn’t have much appetite thinking about what they will be facing later, except for Aomine whom doesn’t know anything.

“What you wrong with all you today?..... Like as if someone is going to die… Tsk…” Aomine blurted out his thoughts as he finishes his last bite of the burger and his last sip of the soda.

“Daiki, you can excuse yourself now.” Akashi frowned and ordered.

“Tsk…..Whatever…” he put his hands at the back of his head before leaving Maji Burger While the rest of the Kiseki went in a different direction as Aomine, towards the hospital. It was about dawn when they got the hospital, Midorima showed the team the way to Kise’s ward. Before entering it, everyone stopped outside the door. They all needed some time to prepare themselves, the news was too unreal to them. It’s hard for them to believe that the Kise that is always smiling, that always that a happy and health glow surrounding him is now laying in this plain and lifeless ward, looking pale and weak. 

Akashi took the initiative to open the door to the ward. But Kise thought it was the nurse and started complaining to the ‘nurse’. He didn’t know that it wasn’t the nurse but his teammates as there was a short corridor in the ward before the visitor could see the patient. 

“ Aiko-chan? Today’s injection is early ssu neh~ Mouu, the injection wound from earlier in the day still hurts ssu~ can we skip this one?~” he asked playfully, still not aware that it was not the nurse that he is talking to. 

“Aiko-chan?~” he asked again as he heard no answer. 

“……………Ryouta….” Akashi and the rest of the team except for Aomine walked in.

“E-eh.. A-akashiscchi… and everyone… W-why are you guys here ssu?..... You guys could have told me before coming ssu, so I don’t have you face all of you in such pathetic state..” He laughed in awkwardness and embarrassment before scratching his head and looking down at the white sheets.

“Kise-kun, stop acting like it’s nothing serious.”

“Kise-chin~ I will give you all my maiubo, so recover~”

“Ki-chan! “ Momoi started sobbing and ran to Kise’s bed before hugging the blond.

“Minna*……..” his voice was shaking as his tears fell on Momoi’s pink hair.

“Why didn’t you tell us earlier Ryouta?..” his gaze at the vulnerable blond softened. 

“I didn’t want everyone to get worried ssu… s-so.. I lied… Sorry…” he grasped onto the sheets.

There was silence in the ward except for Momoi’s sobbing. No one wants to believe this situation, although the truth is right in front of their eyes. 

“Minna*…. I don’t think it matters anymore, anyways, I only have less than two weeks left…..” he smiled mockingly to himself. 

“This is not the Kise-kun I know. The Kise-kun I know will never give up no matter what, he wouldn’t say things like this.” Kuroko said in a slightly different tone from his usual one.  
“I’ll arrange your treatment in America Ryouta.” The red headed teen said with authority.

“Akashicchi, thank you…..But… I have already given up, the treatment will make me loss my hair ssu~ I want to at least die pretty~” he looked up with tears in his eyes, trying to put the best smile that he could, he didn’t want to see his teammates sad, for someone like him.

“I only have one last wish ssu~ and that is for everyone to spend my last few days with me, at least… I can have some pleasant memories to take away with me…. I know I’m being selfish, but please… just let me be wayward for once….” The small forward spoke as more tears fell from his eyes, his frail body was trembling as he cried, the pink hair girl that was still hugging him sobbed louder and no one said a thing.

“We will grant your wish Ryouta….. If that’s what you want.” The captain spoke with a hint of gentleness in his voice. 

“Akashi! We mustn’t give up! We still have hope!” the be-spectacled green hair teen exclaimed. 

“Shintaro, I understand your feelings for Ryouta, but Ryouta knows himself the best. We should give him what he wants.” Akashi said calmly to Midorima. The latter turned and walked out of the ward as the be-spectacled teen felt a layer of moist building up in his eyes. 

Agreeing to Akashi’s decision, the rest of the members kept quiet. The small forward calmed himself before putting up his silly smile again. “Minna~ thank you for respecting my decision~ sorry for making everyone unhappy neh~” 

“Kise-kun, we all want you to be happy.” The shorter teen spoke firmly.

“Kise-chin I can give you all my maiubo if you want.” Murasakibara took out a bunch of umaibo of different flavors out from his pocket putting it on Kise’s bed.

“Thank you Kurokocchi~ Thank you too Murasakibaracchi~ “he wiped off his tears with the back of his hand, putting up a truthful smile but his tears are just like running tape water that couldn’t stop.

“T-thank you… Thank you….. Thank you….” His voice went softer and softer before he covered his crying face with his palms but this time, he is crying with joy and not sadness.

“Minna~ let’s play basketball together again tomorrow~” Kise suggested as he sniffles and wipes his tears away. 

“Kise-kun, but I don’t think your body condition will allow that.” The bluenette spoke in a lecturing tone to the blond.

“Eh~ I will be fine ssu~ I’ll be careful!~” he smiled at the bluenette reassuringly. He really wanted to play together with his teammates again. It have been such a long time since they have last played together. Ever since everyone went their own ways after graduation, they rarely meet up, even if they do, it will be either a friendly match between schools or a proper tournament. They have been playing against each other and not with each other. Kise really wanted to feel the bond that they use to have in Teiko again. 

“Ryouta if you are sure you will be fine then I will make the arrangements.” The red haired captain looked at the blond. 

“Akashicchi you’re the best ssu~” the blond small forward smiled brightly, his eyes glowing with anticipation.

“Very well then, we shall take our leave now and Ryouta, you get some rest, Shintaro will pick you up tomorrow.” Although not being in the same team anymore, every member of the Kiseki still respects Akashi and listens to his instructions. 

“Thank you ssu~ Akashicchi~” he smiled, feeling thankful.

Kise had a tired day, both emotionally and physically from the crying. He is no long the healthy and lively small forward anymore. Although he still had a sparkling personality but his body no longer allow him to be like how he used to be. The illness have taken almost everything away from him, his job, his passion, his joy and his hope. 

The next day…………….  
Kise’s POV  
It was about 11am when I woke up, it is getting harder and harder for me to wake up now, my body is so lethargic all the time that I just feel sleepy every minute when I’m awake. But today is a special day, I will be playing basketball with all my teammates again!~ I feel so happy and filled with energy but I’m pretty sure I will get really tired when I get out of bed. I washed myself up and applied a thin layer of foundation and some blush to give my skin some glow and not so pale and sickly looking, maybe this will reassure Kurokocchi more and not make him so worried. But I’m really so glad that do care for me and worries for me, at least I know that I am not alone. I briefly packed my bag with a water bottle and a towel while I waited for Midorimacchi to come and pick me up. 

I looked over the table and I saw a bunch of maiubo. They were left there by Murasakibaracchi, he was trying to comfort me too ssu neh~ I picked on up and opened it, before putting it in my mouth. The sweet taste and crunchy texture filled my mouth as I tasted some warm salty liquid in my mouth. I am crying again, I’m such a cry baby, how annoying. The tears continued to flow out of my eyes as I finished the whole Umaibo, at the same time I heard the door opening. It must be Midorimacchi. I quickly wiped away the tears on my face and putted up a bright smile to welcome him. 

“Kise, are you ready to go?” Midorimacchi came in with a straight face and his lucky item on his right hand.

“Yes yes~ I’ll get my bag~” I smiled and picked up my bag before standing up.

We left the hospital and a black car was waiting for us at the entrance of the hospital, Midorimacchi ordered me to get into the back seat as he sat in front. 

“Midorimacchi~ I wanted to sit with you ssu~” I pouted as I put down my bag. 

“Kise you’re noisy nanodayo.” Midorimacchi adjusted his glasses.

“Gomen gomen*~ “I giggled lightly as I sat back and looked out of the window.

Today was a really beautiful day, just like my mood, sunny and warm. We soon reached the basketball court and everyone was there, including Aominecchi. I looked away when I noticed Aominecchi looking in my direction. My face was burning from embarrassment, I’m so nervous as I wouldn’t know how to act in front of him later. The car stopped as the driver opened the door for me. I was shocked to receive this kind of special treatment so I gave the driver a bright smile to show my appreciation.

I got out of the car taking a deep breathe. It have been so long since I’ve smelled any fresh air. I smell the freshness of the grass and the warmth of the sun. The corner of my mouth curve upwards as I looked up at the sky, I love the warm and the sunshine, it reminds me of the past when I use to play one-on-one with Aominecchi in a weather like this.

i smiled as I walked towards the court where everybody is at and put my bag down on the floor before starting to do my warm-up, half way through the warm-up I am already beginning to get out of breathe but I didn’t want to worry anyone so I continued regardless. We started our three on three match. Aominecchi, Kurokocchi and Murasakibaracchi was in the same team, while I, Akashicchi and Midorimacchi played against them. All I saw was how well Aominecchi and Kurokocchi cooperated with each other even though they have not played with each other for a long time, I felt a dull pain in my chest, bits of jealousy slowly crawl into my heart, thinking why couldn’t I be the one that could stand beside him, the one that could make him smile. Kurokocchi won Aominecchi and made him find his passion for basketball again and yet me, still couldn’t be as strong as him, still looking up to him as my light, I could only live quietly in his shadow.

I was spacing out during the match until Akashicchi called my name, “Ryouta?....Ryouta?.... are you feeling okay?....”

“….A-ah!! Yes ssu!~ I’m fine ssu!~” I came back to senses and gave Akashicchi an assuring smile. I got my focus back to the match, Akashicchi passed me the ball and the moment the ball got into my hands, Aominecchi rushed up in front of me, trying to intercept my ball. I started to panic, I tried to avoid eye contact but I couldn’t, he was right in front of me, so close. My heart begin to race, my face begin to burn. I worked the ball around me trying to escape from him, but he was so fast, as always. Normally I could have gotten away from him, but now that I have gotten weaker, it was so hard for me. Only after a few seconds, he managed to get the ball from me, and he swiftly made a dunk. We took a break after the first quarter. My face is already starting to get pale and I could feel the pain coming at my abdomen. I reached into my bag for the painkiller but I wasn’t able to find it, I must have forgotten to put it in. But instead I took out a bunch of maiubo and as soon as Murasakibaracchi saw it he moved and sat beside me. I smiled and passed a bunch to him as he started to munch on his happily. I drank lots of water trying to sooth the pain but it wouldn’t go away, I still decided to keep quiet as I really want to spend as much time as possible with my friends.

“Kise, what’s wrong with you, you have gotten so much weaker. Heh, you sure is weak, don’t even dream of overtaking me.” He smirked as he drank from his bottle. 

“E-eh?.. Hehe… yea, I’m weak ssu… I could never overtake Aominecchi, and will never have the chance to…” I laughed mocking at myself as I scratched my head, trying to make myself look embarrassed.

“W-what the hell is wrong with you… Tsk….” Aominecchi snorted and looked away.

The atmosphere have become awkwardly tense and no one said a thing until Kurokocchi started talking in his monotone voice.

“Kise-kun, please don’t say something like this. I’m sure you can overtake Aomine-kun.” He looked at me softly and the slightest curve was observed at the corner of his mouth. 

“I hate to admit this but Kise you are much better than that tan and perverted bastard.” Midorimacchi said calmly as he adjusted his glasses.

“Yes, Ryouta. I prefer you much more to Daiki.” Even Akashicchi joined in to comfort me.

I felt really happy that everyone is speaking up for me and I also feel bad for Aominecchi because I know he is really an amazing person, in all ways. 

“Hehe…. Thank y—“before I could finish my phrase the pain suddenly grew stronger, it felt like someone is stabbing me, I fell onto the ground hugging my stomach and clenched onto my clothes. The pain was so excruciating, I started to sweat and tremble. My body was cold and my face was pale. I could faintly hear voices calling my name but I couldn’t make out whose voices are those. “I must have made them worried sick again…..” I thought to myself before falling into complete darkness.


	4. Realisation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M SUCH A HORRIBLE PERSON. I TOTALLY FORGOT ABT IT UNTIL I RECEIVED A NOTIF TELLING ME SOMEONE LEFT A COMMENT ;-; I RLLY APPRECIATE IT!!!!! HERES THE NEXT CHAPTER!

Before I knew it, I woke up to find myself imprisoned in the familiar walls of white again. I squinted my eyes as the rays of afternoon sun shot into my eyes, I looked around and to my surprise, Aominecchi was sitting by my bed staring at my face. My face started to burn and I waved my hand in front of his face, “A-aominecchi?... Aominecchi?... what are you looking at ssu?... Is there something on my face?.”

Aomine’s POV  
When he opened his eyes, the rays of sunlight that shot into his eyes made his already radiant eyes glow, it is like a yellow crystal, so beautiful yet delicate. He no longer had the lifelines that he used to had in his eyes, why is that?.... Is he that severely ill? Now that I looked at his face in detail, his skin became paler, and his cheeks became slimmer. It didn’t make him look bad, surprisingly it was a different type of beauty. So fragile and delicate and makes people want to protect him. I was pulled back to my sense when he started calling my name with his soft voice, he lost the hint of bubbliness in his voice and it feels really weird. I immediately took my eyes off him and answered, “ A-ah yeah! I mean no! er… em… how are you feeling?..” I scratched the back of my head in embarrassment. 

Kise’s POV 

I have to admit that Aominecchi looks extremely cute when he feels embarrassed, it isn’t like the usual him, but I love every part of him. I tried to smile as brightly as I could in response to his question, “I am alright now ssu~ its just normal gastric~ no big deal ssu~” I sat up using my arms as support and leaned on my pillow. I still feel awkward when I am with Aominecchi, after what happened a few days back. I’m kind of glad that Aominecchi didn’t acted like nothing happened, or was it just all a dream?.... There was a moment of awkward silence, I feel like I should be saying something to break the silence. “Em… Where are the rest ssu?...” I asked. “Akashi and Midorima is talking to the doctor, Kuroko and Murasakibara went out to buy food… they asked me to watch over you…” he answered not looking at me. “A-ah I see ssu…. I’m sorry to have worried everyone..” I looked away from the plain white sheet and out the window. Then, the awkward silence crept in again. 

Aomine’s POV

Is he that concerned about the rest!? Why do I have this weird feeling inside me? It pisses me off when he talks about the others when I am right in front of me, didn’t he confess to me the other day?! Or is he just fooling around with me?! Why the hell am I getting so annoyed over this? What the heck is this feeling?! A-and, why did he confess to me?.....

“Oi- Kise” I called out to his name in a flat tone.

“Em?.. What is it ssu Aominecchi?..” he looked at me with his beautiful golden orbs, with a faint smile on his face. The smile isn’t like his usual one, it kind of lack something…. And that annoys me.

“The other day… When you…” I have this firm feeling, I have to sort this out. If he really likes me I wouldn’t allow him to talk about any other people when I am with him.

“Confessed.” Panic and shock was shown all over his face when I said the last word to my sentence. While I looked at him firmly in the eye, he looked away quickly.   
“Do you mean it?” I asked still looking at him, even though he is trying to avoid eye contact. 

“He…Eh…hehe….Em… W-what confess?...” he was stumbling with his words as he answered, clearly wanting to avoid this. I have to make this clear. This golden retriever in front of me can’t just throw me some confession and leave me to have all these annoyed feelings. 

“Stop avoiding Kise, Do you mean it?” I asked again with a firmer tone.

“O-oh.. T-that! That was a joke ssu… I-I…..” He looked lost and his pretty eyes were filled with panic.

“I see.” I answered coldly, unhappy about the answer that he gave me. Wait, unhappy? Why am I unhappy? I wanted him to be serious?....W-what the hell am I thinking about?!

“I thought so too, if you mean it that’s totally disgusting.” What am I saying?! T-this isn’t what I mean. That face again, the smile that is filled with agony. Why are you smiling when you don’t want to!? Somewhere in my chest hurts to see this expression on his face. I couldn’t bear to see that painful expression of his. I turned my back on him and left the ward without a word. 

Kise’s POV

What can I do except to smile, I don’t know what to do anymore. It hurts so much, my body, my heart…. Aominecchi said it again… That it was disgusting…. The fake smile slowly disappeared on my face and replaced with warm liquid flowing down my face out from my eyes. Ah.. I cried again, how pathetic of me…

In the end, the last thing that I want to do was left undone, to tell him that I love him, but it was all taken as a joke. My love, went Unheard again…..  
My tears wouldn’t stop. The conflicting desire of wanting to run after him and tell him that the confession wasn’t a joke and be held in his arms. But the helplessness of physical and psychological pain restrained me from doing that. I looked blankly out the window as the sunlight blinded my eyes. Coming to acceptance or rather giving up on hopes of what is left of me.   
Unknowingly, my tears stopped. Before I know it, it was almost near sunset. I watched the brightness in the room disappearing, darkness slowly flooding the ward. My back was stiff and my legs were numb from hours of stillness. My ward was completely dark and I did not bother to turn on the lights. Then I heard the sound of the door opening.  
“Kise, why don’t you turn on the lights?” it was Midorimacchi.

“Don’t turn it on ssu…..” I said quietly, I didn’t want him to see my pathetic state. My eyes must be all red and puffy and my hair must be in a mess too.

I….. only want to be the sunny and happy Ryouta that they know.

I can hear Midroimacchi walking towards me in the dark and his voice filled with the slightest concern was heard

“Is something wrong?” He sat down on the chair by my bed that Aominecchi sat on hours ago.

“Midorimacchi, what did the doctor say ssu?...” my eyes were still staring out the window. The moon was all covered by the clouds. 

“Is it time for me to go?.....”

“Stop saying stupid things nanodayo! T-there must be a cure for this….” But we all know that is impossible. I can imagine Midorimacchi’s face now that must be filled with annoyance but much more of care and concern. Maybe it was a good thing that we are in the dark now.

“a week nanodayo….” There was a long pause before he spoke, followed by another.

“I see….” I putted up that pathetic smile again, despite no one can see it. Seems like it have become a habit for me.

“Stop putting up that idiotic face…” seems like Midorimacchi knows me the best neh…

“Midorimacchi…..” I called out to his name softly.

“Hmm?....” he let out a low and soft hum.

“Thank you…. For your love..” That time when he kissed me, actually I was awake and so did I heard his words. I don’t want his love to go Unheard, like mine……

“…..What?.....” there was a hint of panic in his voice.

“I heard all of it ssu…. Sorry, only if I could, I would definitely fall for you ssu! But, God wouldn’t allow that ssu neh….”

“Stop it nanodayo! The whole world knows that you like that idiot except himself!” he raised his voice.

“Eh?.. was it that obvious…..” slight embarrassment was heard in my voice.

Before i could say anymore, I fell into a warm embrace as those warm arms surround me. Midorimacchi let down his usual cold self and exposed his heart in front of me. He buried his face in my shoulder and soon my clothes was wet by his tears. I hesitated for a second before I put my arm around this vulnerable teen.

“I’m sorry….. I’m sorry Midorimaccchi…. “ I mumbled softly as I rested my chin on his shoulder.

Silence filled the room as I felt his arms held me tighter.

“Ryouta….Ryouta…. why…. Ryouta…..” he called my name again and again as if I would be leaving.

Aomine’s POV

Was I too harsh of me?.... I said it was disgusting..…. I-I should go back and get things clear….

I walked back to the ward and opened the door. The ward was in darkness so I turned on the lights without second thoughts.

What I saw made my heart sank. The dull pain slowly spreads across my chest as I saw Kise being tightly held in Midorima’s arms. The pain was then replaced by irrational anger, my eyes that were once filled with disappointment is now filled with unknown rage.

I stood at the door in silence as I glared at Kise who was looking at me in shock. Midorima was back facing me, still holding Kise in his arms not showing any response to my intrusion. I want to go up to Midorima and pull him away from Kise with all my might, but my body wouldn’t move, I only stood that in silence and rage.

I finally burst out in anger, “Ha… Kise, you’re fucking disgusting after all! Not only for being gay and even touching other man even after you confessed to me?! Huh?!.... I hope you rot in hell!” I stormed out of the room and slammed the door behind me.

Midorima’s POV

I felt fragile blonde’s body stiffen in my arms, I held him tighter but he tried to pull away from me. I frowned and sighed as I let go of him. I figured I should say something to comfort him, “don’t listen to what he say, he is just-“

“I’m fine Midorimacchi, don’t worry, he have always been like that ssu…. I’m used to it.” The expression that I hate the most, that pathetic fake smile that no one could read. Kise is a pretty simple guy, unlike Akashi, and that’s what attracts me to him. But that expression was…. So hard to read, even harder than Akashi, and when he puts up that expression, nothing good ever happened.

“Don’t smile if you don’t want to, stupid.” I ruffled his hair gently as I adjusted my glasses.

“Thank you Midorimacchi….Maybe I would have suffered less if I fell for you in the beginning…” The small forward grabbed my hand wrapped with bandage and cupped his cheeks with my hand. I could feel warm liquid soaking through my bandage, feeling it on my fingertips.   
Looking down at the blond that was once so cheery and bubbly to be in a state of acceptance of his own death, pained me deeply like all the rest of the members of the Kiseki No Sedai, but at the same time, I held a special feeling for him that perhaps no one else had I refuse to accept the fact that the person that I hold so dearly, the person that I’ve loved for the longest time in my life would be gone from this Earth just in the matter of a few weeks’ time. 

Why…. Why must this happen to him…. To me….When I thought I could finally master up my courage to confess, and being stupidly positive and hopeful that perhaps he might accept me. But now, I’ve lost the chance, the chance to even be hopeful…….

Ryouta, I love you.


	5. Calm Before the Storm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this chapter, there isn't much progress seen in the plot, but i have added more inner conflict of the main characters as suggested by one of the reviews. Im sorry that this chapter took so long to be updated because i was running out of ideas.  
> Again, im sorry if this chapter is rather short and boring, but bear with me guys! Tension needs time to build up! And once again, please R&R!  
> -Kiyocchi

Aomine's POV

No! No! No! That's not what I want to say! Fuck! What is this feeling?! Why am I getting so pissed off when I don't even…I don't even…like him…

I ruffled my hair in annoyance, trying to figure out what is going on in my brain. All I can think about now is his face. Those tear filled eyes, pale and sunken cheeks that lost its natural and healthy glow that he always had. It looked like as if he had given up on something, the glow in his eyes disappear and all I saw was infinite emptiness and sadness. I just couldn't get him out of my mind.

I leaned against the door as I closed my eyes. I tried to get his face out of my mind but to no avail, all his expressions that I've ever seen is appearing in my mind. His smile of satisfaction when we finished our one-on-one, even though he lost as usual. His tears when he lost to me in the Too vs Kaijo match and those determined eyes that looked into mine when he said he will never admire me anymore and that face… that I never thought he would ever make. The one that is filled with sadness and hopelessness, seeing his tears made my heart ache.

Do I actually love him?...

Kise's POV  
I could feel the warmth of Midorimacchi's hand. It somehow made me feel better. His hand was big, just like Aominecchi's, although I didn't get a chance to hold them. I feel bad for Midorimacchi, but I imagined this hand to be Aominecchi's. How I hope… he could really cup my cheeks like this and tell me… tell me that he loves me….

We stayed like this for a while before Midorimacchi said he need to go. I let go of his hand and wiped the tears dry with the back of my hand. Midorimacchi left after placing a kiss on my forehead. Then I was left alone again in the seemingly enormous ward.

Come to think of it, when did I even fall for Aominecchi? He was carefree back then in Teiko, passionate about basketball and nothing else. He was an idiot that wasn't good with his studies but extremely gifted in basketball. His passion for basketball was what got me into basketball and now I so deeply love. My love for basketball is deeply connected with my love for Aominecchi. The love for both was inseparable, even though I said I wouldn't admire him anymore, but there it was, still remaining in my heart.

Maybe it's my fate that I can never surpass him. People often say I am like a ray of sunshine, always so bright and always so good at everything. But compared to him, I am merely a small tiny star in the night sky. He had been my sun ever since I started basketball in Teiko, he was the sun I looked up to. I wanted to be like him, to be as strong as him. But I was never able to be standing by his side during his moments of victory, it has always been Kurokocchi. But even so, I was happy for him. Just watching him from a far to see him smile was more than enough for me.

But now, all I've received was his words of disgust. I saw his face that was filled with rage and despise, my heart sunk to rock bottom. It is aching more than before…  
Maybe it is time for me to let go...to forget…to give up…

Aominecchi… You know something?...I really love you…But, forgive me. I might not be able to deliver this love to you anymore….

I'm Sorry..

Third Person's POV

Kise is already having difficulties to stay awake, his weight was below the average BMI for a healthy male teen. He is constantly in a state of unconsciousness, despite not doing anything, every minute awake was painful for him. The drugs no longer worked it, couldn't help with his pain. His muscles are weakening, the well-toned body as an athlete was lost, and he was near the extent of just skin and bones. He needs oxygen masks to help him breath because of his weakening muscles. The cancerous cells are spreading like wild fire in his body, giving no mercy.

Midorima visits Kise everyday just to sit by his bed, holding his hands. Just looking at the blonde's face pains him. The fact that the blonde might just leave this world one night when he is asleep when he himself don't even know, scares him. Under Kise's request, all treatments were stopped. His reason was he didn't want to lose anymore hair, he wanted to look handsome even when he leaves. His death was so certain to everyone that knows of his illness, and no one has yet to accept that except for himself. Despite the painful acceptance, Kise still spent his time awake trying his best to smile, fooling himself that he will leave with no regret, but even an idiot knows, that was not the case.

Although Midorima knows that there is no way for one suffering from the last stage of cancer to recover in such a short time, but for the first time, he naively hoped for a miracle to chance upon the one he loves. While Aomine on the other hand is not completely unaware of Kise's condition, he thought something was off when Kise told him it was just gastric, but after that one time when he visited Kise trying to clear things out but instead end up hurting him, made him feel more certain that the blonde and the rest of The Generation of Miracles is hiding something from him and so he decided to find out for himself.

But little did he know, the news that would be broken to him would leave him in such state of despair that he never thought he would ever experience.

Aomine's POV

I messed up my short and clean cut hair, as the feeling blocks my chest. I don't get it, things like love and all that bullshit.. tsk…

I picked up my phone and dialled a number before putting it next to my ear, expecting a her loud and high pitch voice complaining about me not going to practice, but instead I heard nothing of that. She was soft at the other end of the phone, lacking her usual energy. But I didn't care much about that, what bothers me more was the feeling that is bugging me in my chest.

"What is it Dai-chan?... it's rare for you to call me.." she spoke softly, as if dreading something,

"How does it feel like to…love someone?..." I hesitated before I asked while ruffling my hair with my other hand.

"Hm? Why are you asking such a question all of a sudden?.." If it was her usual self, she would tease me and ask me if I am having a crush on anyone but failing my expectation again, she didn't.

"Tsk… I just want to know. Just tell me." I clicked my tongue, feeling annoyed for no specific reason.

"You can't stop thinking about that person, you feel annoyed when you see them with someone else and their well-being matters to you a lot?..."

"….O-Oh… I see….Thanks…."My heart skipped a beat when she said all that, it was exactly how I felt about…Him…Shit!

"And by the way, what's wrong with that guy?" I frowned and asked again before she could speak.

It took her sometime to react, "E-eh?! I-I…. Ki-chan… I…." she fell silent.

"How do you know I am talking about Kise?" There was obvious doubt in my voice.

"I'm sorry Dai-chan…I-I can't tell you…" Soon after, her soft sobs were heard.

"All of you are hiding something from me aren't you guys?! What am I?! An outsider?!" I was at the peak of my rage.

First it was Kise's stupid confession, the next minute he is in the hospital hugging that damn green headed tsundere and now they are hiding some fucking secret from me. What am I?! A damn fool?!.

I slammed the phone on my bed, and grabbed my jacket before storming out of the house and headed towards the hospital.

I am going to make that damn blonde spill everything!


	6. Discovery

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late update guys. Thanks for all the reviews, it really kept me going. Enough of blabbering, enjoy the new chapt<3

Arriving at the door of him ward once again, I took a deep breathe before I slide open the door. 

And there he was again, that moss head Midorima, why is he here all the time?! Is he a fucking pest or something?! He was sitting back facing me obviously not sensing my presence. Kise was lying in bed unconscious and this time an oxygen mask on his face.

Why does he need that when he told me it was only gastric?.... 

I stomped hard enough into the ward to make my presence heard to the spectacled man. He turned around to look at me with his usual poker face but sadness was loaded in his expression. I thought he was someone who barely showed his emotions, it was my first time to see him like this. 

“Aomine, why are you here nanodayo” He adjusted his glasses uncomfortably, maybe due to my presence.

“You guys are hiding something from me aren’t you?! Treating me like a damn fool!” I frowned and looked down at him as he sat on the chair next to Kise’s bed.

“Hiding?.. Ha… Maybe? What’s the point of it now, at this point of time..” He said in a monotone as if mocking me. “You are just too stupid to realize things for yourself.”

“Who are you calling stupid huh?! You bastard!” I raised my voice at him, but not too loud, aware that Kise is asleep. 

“…..Look at him. The state he is in….And yet here you are throwing a kid’s tantrum after hurting him with your words yesterday.” He clenched his fist as he spoke. Fear start to arise from my heart as I was afraid that what if something is really wrong about him. 

“What the hell do you mean?! The state he is in?...” I am scared about the confrontation. I have a feeling that the truth is something I do not want to hear.

“All of us know, except you. Aomine. He wanted us to keep a secret from you. ” He looked at the blonde.

“Just tell me already! God dammit!!” I grabbed his shoulder, the dreadful feeling becoming stronger.

“He doesn’t have much time to live. It’s the last stage of cancer.” He held Kise’s boney hand, and the pained expression is so obvious. 

I couldn’t speak. I was beyond shock. Anger, shock, agony, misery, with all that, poignant regret flooded me. My knees were weak, I feel like I could no longer stand. I tumbled backwards and sunk myself into the small sofa that is in the ward. I covered my face with my hands, soon to feel warm liquids overflowing from my eyes. I started sobbing, my ego was shattered, completely ignoring the presence of Midorima.

I was not prepared for this. 

What the hell is ‘Not much time to live’!? For the first time in my life, I would rather not face the reality. The aching in my chest reminded me of my feelings for Kise. That blonde idiot that became a part of my life without me knowing. I have been used to his persistency of always following behind me, admiring me. But to see him lying in bed so lifelessly makes me feel like I lost a huge part of my life. His presence is like the sun, you don’t bother about its presence when it’s there, but when it’s gone, all you see is darkness. I feel like I am being slowly drowned by darkness as the time ticks by and his life draining away. This feeling is suffocating.

He used to say to me  
“Aominecchi! You know something?~”

“What? Idiot.”

“You are my world!~” 

I didn’t take it seriously back then, but now. Kise. I need you. You are my sun, the world can’t survive without the sun you idiot. Don’t you understand?! Come back… Kise…I….

Uncontrollable sobs took over me again, it’s the first time I have cried so much in my life, who would have known, these tears would be shed for Kise.

A familiar voice was heard, it was soft and almost inaudible. 

“Aominecchi?.....”

“Kise, lay back down.” It was Midorima’s voice.

I didn’t want to let him see me like this. I wiped my face with my hand, trying to erase any signs of crying. I looked up, my reddened eyes to meet his golden orbs that was looking at me with worry.

That idiot, still have the time to worry about someone else when he is such a state. He looked at me without a word, and looked at Midorima with eyes that are brimmed with tears.

“Midorimacchi…. Did….did Aominecchi find out about it?....” I could see his fist clenching, he’s biting his pale lips, apparently trying to hold in his sobs, but tears are already falling from his eyes.

Midorima showed a painful frown and pulled Kise into his embrace with no response to the obvious situation. At that moment, they looked like lovers, I felt so extra, and that kind of brought rage to my chest.

“Kise Ryouta. I demand an explanation from you!” I stood up from the sofa, shouting with anger and misery.

He was still in Midorima’s embrace, still sobbing. But managed to piece out a sentence.

“Like what Midorimacchi might a told you… I am a dead man.” The acceptance in his voice made me even angier. 

“What the fuck?! Why did you tell everyone but me?! What am I to you?!” I walked up to his bed, looking down at him as Midorima held him tighter. 

“Aomine! You!” Midorima tried to grab me by the collar but Kise grabbed Midorima’s arm before his hand could reach my collar. Kise then tightened his arms around Midorima’s waist, as if looking for security.

“Because you are too important to me. That’s why.” Kise stilled refused eye contact with me, what is he afraid of?...

“Aominecchi… That confession wasn’t a lie.” Upon hearing this, it was obvious that Midorima didn’t look quite happy but he still kept silent.

“I love you Aominecchi… I really do…When I have finally came to acceptance to forget about the feelings I have you, and here you are again, messing up my thoughts. I’m tired…I really am.” He finally looked up at me with his golden orbs that was filled with pain and tiredness, I was caught off guard with his expression. It was like as if something stabbed my chest really hard, it aches. 

“Kise.. I ….” I looked back at him with the feeling of guilt and pain.

“Aominecchi, you don’t have to apologize. It was my fault for falling for you in the beginning.” He forced a smile that did not manage to hide his pained expression.

Kise…. How am I supposed to tell you that I love you too?....


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

"Actually, I thought my love would go unheard, I thought I would carry it with me to my grave. But I'm not as happy as I thought I would be after you received my feelings toward you. I'm sorry Aominecchi…. I'm sorry…. But even if I had a choice back then, I would still choose to fall for you.." A genuine smile rose to his cheeks, "it was fun spending time with you Aominecchi, those matches that we had, those walks that we took to the convenient store. It might seem small to you, but it is really significant to me. I will never forget it, not even after I die." His face and tone suggested complete acceptance to his approaching death, and I am deeply pained by that. 

"Kise…. STOP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! YOU ARE NOT GOING TO DIE!" I am losing my mind, I cannot think straight. All of the memories of me and him together are jumbled up in my head. I can no longer comprehend my emotions at this moment. It was sadness, desperation, anguish and disbelief. The refusal to accept this fact. 

"I'm sure Akashi can do something right?! He-he can do everything right?!" I was just blabbering whatever I can think about, desperately trying to avoid the truth. 

But I can't escape. 

Midorima adjusted his glasses with his index finger, frowning with sadness. "Akashi suggest to bring Ryouta to America for treatment… But he refused. It was his own will." 

Once again, upon hearing that, I lost it. "KISE! YOU BASTARD! WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO DO REFUSING TREATMENT! YOU ARE GOING TO AMERICA NOW! ASK AKASHI TO BOOK A TICKET NOW!" 

I feel like a fool, a complete fool. While I am screaming my heads off at Kise. He is just looking at me with his golden orbs that is filled with tears and infinite sadness and agony. After hearing Kise's long speech that was dedicated to me, Midorima kept quiet after a really long time, his frown was even tighter, and the pained look on his face had become more obvious. 

"Aominecchi, I was my choice to not receive treatment.. I know it would be of no use since this was how my mother passed away. She received chemotherapy every week, but the condition never got better. But instead, she is suffering more pain, losing her beautiful blonde hair that she passed on to me. You know, she was the most beautiful woman that I have ever seen in my whole life, but after a week after she started receiving the chemotherapy, she was also unrecognizable to me. Aominecchi, I don't want to be like her, I want to remain as that health and bright Kise Ryouta in all of your memories." 

I did not know what to say. His complete acceptance gave me more sense of despair. I am slowly being forced to accept this reality. I feel hopeless, and guilt is rising to my chest, suffocating me. I want to let it all out, I want to weep my hearts out. But I can no longer react. I stood there quiet, looking at Kise as he looked out the window. 

Midorima spoke to break the awkward silence that I created by not responding. 

"Kise, how about your Senpais at Kaijo? Have you informed them of this yet?" He turned to look at Kise, with sympathy. 

"Right… Kasamatsu senpai is not informed of this..Ah… What should I do…" He frowned as he lets out a sigh. "I really don't want to tell them….Senpai is going to kill me." He let out a dry laugh that carried the emotion of sadness. 

"Midorimacchi… what should I do.." 

"Telling them is your only choice Ryouta, there is no other way." Midorima answered, trying to act as calm as possible. 

"Alright….I-I'll give Kasamatsu senpai a call….Hope he doesn't kill me for lying to him…" 

Kise's POV 

I picked up my phone anxiously, nervous to make the call. I went into my contact list and tapped on Kasamatsu senpai's number. I waited a while before I pressed the dialling button. The wait for him to pick up felt like hours, I dreaded this day where I have to tell them the truth about what is going on with me. I fear to hear the way they would react, I didn't want to see the pained expression on their faces, those expressions that I saw on Midorimacchi's face as unbearable for me. I didn't want to see that happen again. But I have to. I don't have a choice. I am doomed to experience this pain, mentally and physically. 

"Hello? Kasamatsu Yukio speaking." I thought of senpai's face when he was mad at me when I heard his serious voice. 

"Hello? Senpai? This is Kise…"I dreaded to continue talking. I don't want to say it! I don't want to! 

"Kise? I thought you are in France? You are back already?" 

"Uh…Kind of?..." I don't want to tell him! 

"If you are back you jolly well come back for practice right now!" He sounded a little pissed, but I'm used to it. Ah.. I really miss them…. 

"Sorry senpai… I lied….I-I….." I am panicking, it is getting hard to breath, my breathe quickened and I sound like I am panting. 

"What do you mean you are lying? Oi! Kise! A-are you okay?!" This is bad… I can't breath… I must sound really scary to be breathing this heavily. 

"Ha….Ha….Ha….Ha…." the phone slipped from my hand as I clutched my chest, leaning forward, still panting heavily. 

My vision is blur and my consciousness is slipping away from me. I felt someone shaking my shoulder trying to tell me to calm down, but I could not capture their exact words. I was not in control of my breathing anymore, the lack of oxygen in my brain stopped my ability to think. I faintly heard someone dashing out of the door while Midorimacchi embraced me into his arms trying to calm me down. Before I lost my consciousness, I heard Midorimacchi talking to someone, probably on the phone with Kasamatsu senpai. The last thought that went through my mind was the dreadfulness towards the arrival of my Kaijio teammates. 

Midorima's POV 

Kise's panic attack was so sudden that it shocked both me and Aomine. I got him to get the doctors first while I try to calm Kise down. As I thought, it was too much for him to face another confrontation of his illness and this roller coaster of emotions just overwhelms him so much which then led to him hyperventilating while on the phone with his senpai. 

"I shouldn't have asked him to call his captain… tsk.." I mumbled to myself as I looked down at the unconscious blond sleeping in my arms. I could no longer recall his vibrant and cheerful smile, his smile with confidence which still had the healthy glow on his skin. All I can remember of him right now, is how he cried when he told me the truth, his eyes that were filling with infinite sadness that I would never expect to see from him, the smile that he puts up when he is trying to cover up the pain that he is going through. I could not erase those expressions of him from my mind, whenever I close my eyes, his face with agony appears in my head, stabbing my heart time after time. It was still hard for me to accept the fact that he will be soon gone from this world, the world were memories were made. 

Soon, he is going to disappear from our lives. 

Aomine came dashing through the door with a doctor and a few nurses behind him. They rushed into the ward and started checking on Kise, so I had to let him go from my arms. I was reluctant and hesitant, I am afraid of letting him go. 

I don't want to let you go. 

"Check for ventricle pressure." The doctors were busy checking on him while I sat with Aomine on the small sofa. The sofa seemed too small to fit two fully grown, nearly 2-meter men but we cannot be bothered by such trivial things. Aomine kept quiet, but his expression was tense, tenser than any emotion that I had seen from him before. He always had that "I can't be bothered" look, but from the look that he has right now, I know he is dead worried, not less than how much I'm feeling. 

"You like him, don't you." He asked in a deep voice while still keeping his dark blue orbs on the small forward that is lying in bed looking as lifeless as ever. 

"Only fools would not have realized. Like him and you." I tried to sound as calm as I could possibly be. 

"…..I like him too….. But…I guess it's too late a time for my realization. " Instead of rebutting me about calling him a fool, he was engrossed in his grieve. 

I kept silence to his response. It is now clear that we are now love rivals. But soon, we will have to end this rivalry. 

Not because Kise would make a choice, but because he can't. 

"How….How could I just have realized…. How could I … Kise… I'm… " He showed an expression that I have never seen before, one that is filled with disbelief and grieve, similar to the one that he had when he lost to Kuroko but much, much worst. I even doubt Momoi would have not seen this expression before. His eyes lost focus, pupils contracting. He was in a state of not having a facial expression, but the emotions that he is going through is effectively delivered through this seemingly emotionless face. 

Kise, I thought you said you don't want to make us sad? 

And look at us now.


	8. Chapter 8

Suggested BGM: ありがとう the pearl edition by KOKIA 

Midorima's POV 

Both of us just seat there, in complete silence, not able to say a word. But the silence filled my heart with emptiness. Even since I have known Kise, this sort of silence is not something usual for me. We were always surrounded by the joy that Kise brought us, although some of us might not have realized it. It became a habit for all of us to receive text from Kise every morning and night, even if its just a simple good morning or good night, of course it is filled with all the emoticons that he likes to use. But ever since he was hospitalized, all of it stopped. I took out my phone and looked at all the texts we used to send, even though i showed him a cold attitude, he still replied as if we were having such a great time, and to be honest, it was great. Seeing his name appear on my phone everyday without fail brings me the slightest joy even if my day is filled with bad luck as OhaAsa have predicted. I scrolled through our text and saw all those boring messages that Kise had sent me. My gripped tighten as those flashbacks of our times together appeared in my mind. Aomine is sitting beside me, not moving an inch. His expression was like none that i have seen before. His hands gripped tight together supporting his chin and elbows resting against his knees. His head is hanging low as it the dreadfulness is weighing his head down. Both of us are feeling the same emotions, depression, sadness, dreadfulness. But in comparison with the scene that is opposite of us, Kise seemed rather angelic. He looks so pale and light, with the afternoon rays shinning into the ward and gently landing on Kise’s face, he seems surreal as if he might just fade away with the orange rays that are shinning into the room. 

The sound of the door opening broke the dreadful silence that we are in, while Kise is still laying there peacefully. The door opens to the sight of the entire Kaijo team, with Kasamatsu standing in front with an expression that we have never seen before. It was of disbelief, greif, shock and confusion all combined, we can tell that the rest of the team is not feeling any better. Kasamatsu took the first step into the ward and is immediately greeted by the sight of their ace, laying lifelessly on the hospital bed, all of their faces showed shock and disbelief. He walked towards the hospital bed, it was obvious that his steps are not steady, its the first time seeing the fierce captain of Kaijo to show such vulnerable side to this teammates. He approached the bed and sat down by Kise, hanging his head low. I see tears dropping down onto his hand, and his shoulders starting to shake. He seems like his mumbling something to himself. 

Kasamatsu’s POV

“Kise.. You damn bastard.. Don’t think that you can do anything just because you are the ace of our team. Now you are telling me that you are going to die?..” My fists were clenched tight, I couldn’t feel them anymore.

“Oi.. Kise!” I raised my voice without noticing.

“Stop joking around now and get up!! You..you are still going back for practice! ” Looking at him, I’m trying hard to not let tears fall out my eyes. I can’t even imagine how ugly I might look right now. 

Kise... What happened to the promise that you made to us... To be our ace and bring Kaijo to the top.. Who is going to take my place as the captain of Kaijo after I leave. How...how could you... 

Midorima tapped on my shoulder as I came back to my senses.

“Kasamatsu, I don’t think Kise is going to wake up any time soon….I think you should leave first, he will be overwhelmed again if he sees all of you here. He’s already so affected after just giving you a call… I’m sorry.”

I nodded slowly but still have my gaze fixed on Kise. 

“But please call me again once his condition have stabilised, I want to talk to him again. This is all too hard for the team and me to accept.” I turned back to look at the team, there was no sound but I could see all of their eyes brimming with tears, but Hayakawa has already ran out of the ward, we could all hear his wailing in the corridors. We were all close to Kise back in the team, he was like a centre piece that brought all of us together.

We all remember those times when he suggested all sorts of team bonding activities after matches, almost every karaoke session and dinner sessions were initiated by him. He knew and cared about us so much that he never forget any of our birthdays, he even remembers Coach Takeuchi’s birthday.  
Ever since he joined the team, everyone started to understand how much of an amazing person he is, despite his childishness and whininess that gets on our nerves all the time.

Kise we really want you back…. Even if it’s the last time…

Aomine’s POV

My mind is flashing with memorise of Kise, the time we had together, playing basketball, eating ice popsicles, the first time we met…..

“Ouch!!” I could still remember as he rubbed his head and turned around, staring at me with his stunning golden orbs that was glistening under the after sun, I was mesmerized even though they were filled with annoyance.

I grinned as I held up my hand apologetically “Haha, sorry about that, that’s my ball.” 

He showed me a merely polite smile and walked off, despite his seemingly arrogant attitude, his physical appearance still left an impact on me. Never have I ever thought that we would be playing in the same team, even having us falling for each other.

As the flashbacks played in my mind, my feelings for him grew stronger. It constantly sends me reminders on how little time he had left to live, regret, guilt and sadness filled my mind. The times I had with him were turning black and white, as if they are soon going to be haunting memorises that I can never forget. I laid my eyes on the unconscious blond, my eyes watered, my nose was sore. I held my sobs in, but tears were still overflowing from the brim of my eyes. At this moment, I resent myself for being so stupid.

How could I not have realised that I liked him?....

And that he liked me too…

But when I finally do, this had to happen. 

If I had realised sooner, he would at least have spent his last moments, happy, with me, with no regret.

Kise….how I wish you can recover and will go back to being that silly Kise that I once enjoyed teasing, the silly blond that I like… Always pestering me to play one on one with him… I will bring you on dates to the amusement park, buy you ice cream, take the ferris wheel and kiss you when we reach the top. Giving you kisses during practice just to see your flustered reaction and do things that will make you cry out in pleasure at night.

Now that I’ve realised, there are so many things I want to do and continue doing with Kise, and I am still in denial that he will soon be gone.

Kise’s POV

By the time I woke up its already evening. Looking around the ward, I found Aominecchi standing by the window and Midorimacchi sitting on the couch in front of me. The first to realize that I was awake was Midorimacchi. He stood up with a relieved look on his face, although I am sure that others can’t tell, but knowing him for this long have taught me how to read his facial expressions even though it seems like there is none.

“Did senpai come?.......” i asked with warry.

“He did, and I told him about your condition.” He spoke with his usual calmness but I could see the flicker of sadness across his face.

“What did he say?...” I don’t want to hear the answer to be honest, I’m afraid to be confronted with so many other sad faces after they heard about me.

“He didn’t say anything, I think it wasn’t easy for them to take the news. Just like how it was for all of the Kiseki when we first knew.” He adjusted his glasses with his long slim finger, still wrapped with tape. This is a way he expresses his emotions, I can tell he is feeling uncomfortable.

“I’m sorry Midorimacchi……” I looked down at the white bed sheet almost as pale as my face. I feel the wetness in my eyes but I’m dying to keep it in. 

“You don’t have to apologize Kise, it’s not your fault…” Midorimacchi really started to soften up recently, ever since he knew I got sick. Who would have known he is such a gentle person. He pulled me into his embrace, I could smell his scent. A clean fresh smell of soap, simple but pleasant, it sort of calms me down. I stayed in his embrace putting my arm around his waist, before I felt someone staring.

Before it could get anymore awkward, Aominecchi marched towards us pulling us apart and stared at Midorimacchi as if a predator staring at its prey. I let out an awkward laugh, trying to sooth the atmosphere. 

“A-Aominecchi?.. Haha.. I didn’t see you there.” Actually I did, but I really don’t know what to say.  
Aominecchi looked at me for a brief moment before leaning down, looking at me straight in my eyes. His face was really close to mine, it made my heart race, I could feel his breath caressing my cheeks. 

“What…what is it Aominecchi?...” I look at him puzzled, averting my gaze away from his face.

“!!!” 

The next thing I felt was a warm pair of lips pressed against mine. My brain was not able to process what just happened. My eyes widened, pupils dilated. Something wet brushed against my lips gently, it made me relax my jaws as the tingling sensation moved down my neck and down to my spine. Before I know it, the wetness intruded my mouth roaming the territory.  
Then I realized, Aominecchi is kissing me.

My tongue is forcefully entangled with his as his kiss is so invasive in nature, he continued on as I felt the breathlessness rush up my chest, it was only then I finally decided to shove him away. He pulled away from me, cheeks slightly tinted with redness despite his dark skin. I was panting slightly as I looked at him with surprise in my watery eyes. 

“A-Aominecchi?.....” My face flushed as he looked at me

“I love you Kise.” 

Upon hearing those words, my head went blank. My vision started to get blurry as my eyes start to brim with tears. He was still looking at me with those ocean blue eyes as if they are sucking me in.

What…what did he just say?... 

He loves me?....

I hear a familiar voice, as if coming from a distance, calling my name. Its Aominecchi’s voice, his calling my name. My eyes gained focus again and looked at his face, a smile uncontrollably appeared on my face with tears streaming down my cheeks at the same time. They were tears of joy. 

I finally heard the words that I longed to hear for the longest time in my soon ending life.

“I love you too Aominecchi.

 

 

Im so sorry guys im an asshole for not updating so long. Its finally my long holiday and I got my lazy ass up to update this chapter. If you are still following this story I hope that you enjoy this chapter and leave an review, it really encourages me to keep writing! Thanks for all your support all these time!!! Love you guys!!!  
-Kiyocchi


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